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4G is not for me, but the real pirates will luv it


You can't have failed to smell the beany guff of the hype machine around "4G". Due to a government more interested in badger culls, smoking bans and kids looking at naughties on the net there was a bit of an admin error that left just one mobile network able to offer allegedly faster data services to its customers. Some long past it Soho marketing types decided to brand the merger of T-mobile and Orange as Everything Everywhere. Which sounds like the name of some kind of 90s novelty boy toy dance act rather than a mobile network.They want to lock you down to a two-year contract spending nearly £40 a month for the right to download less data than a single episode of a wack TV show. Like some clip joint in the glossier parts of Prague, only the rich and stoopid would go anywhere near it. In fact, if you reckon your 3G phone is a bit slow, realise the bottleneck is not the pipe down to it, but the data coffee straws feeding it. The UK's net infrastructure is inferior to Rwanda (at least the cities there) in most respects and this is likely to get worse. But that's not the real problem.The issue is the Man is still looking for a way to lock down and charge for His Music. The BPI � an organisation more dedicated the to shaking down Grannies for downloading a tinny little Cliff Richard MP3 by mistake than ensuring the future of British music, sees 4G as another chance to impose a tax on the public. If mobile operators can be bullied to get onside, the vision of paying a few pence every time some pop scat is streamed onto a handset will become a dream of reality. And the Soundclouds of this world will simply be blocked for those that don't pay the Britney Spears Sales Fee.Luckily, the suits that run telecoms are not too interested in playing policeman for these unfunky dinos. Not because they love us, but because it would set a very dangerous precedent. If I post yet another dark and sexually threatening postcard to Pete, say, is that my fault or the Postie's? In current Law, the crime is mine. The moment this common sense tradition is compromised, the Postie will have to read my nonsense and decide if it's dodgy before delivering it. That means you will pay £13 for a stamp and get your post once a month.So it probably will not happen. At least, not yet. Of course from our Rat Racks this epic battle of cheese slingers is happening in another dimension. Music is precious, physical and spiritual. It's not something that comes for free or easily down some digital pipe, squished and squashed into MP3 blasphemy. It's best on hot black wax, and we have an arsenal of the funky stuff for you this Saturday: Loads of nice soul, reggae, classic rock and country, indie and DIY post punk, electronic music, jazz and hip hop including the likes of : Barbara Lynn, Lee Perry, Ramsey Lewis Trio, New age Steppers, The Smiths, OS Mutantes, Horace Silver, Mandrill, Scott Walker, The left Banke, John Cage, Bogdan Raczynski, Digital Mystikz, The Maytones, King Tubby...And that's just a preview! See you there...

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